I waited for about an hour and a half to finally get myself in a bus. It was raining hard. The drops of rain felt like pellets leaving off marks on my pale skin like milkfish marinated in vinegar.

Everyone seemed to be outside that Friday evening. All is rushing to get somewhere.

It was alone. As if people around me conspired to make me feel miserable.

I failed my math courses; my best friend watched movie with a guy she just met yesterday; my neighbor, who usually accompanies me home, was sick; and my sister, who studies a few blocks away from my school, got herself in a fight, decided to go home early that day.

                I wanted to scream! Why now? On this very day when I badly needed someone to talk to. Someone whom I could blurt out my sentiments about my failures, about my professor who keeps on asking me to go out with him, about my Dad who got his officemate pregnant….things that are bothering me along with this rain.

                Finally, after shoving all those wet bodies, I stepped inside the bus. I was making a few steps when …alas! I slipped and found my face about to kiss the shoes of an old fat woman. She looked irritated as if I plotted slipping and getting myself the center of their attention! How I wish I wasn’t there at all!

                A fine man held out his hand and helped me get a seat. The conductor of the bus came towards me and gave me the ticket. I looked inside my bag and realized that my wallet is missing! I started looking for it. I knew right then that I lost my wallet my grandma bought me out of pity. It was some sort of lollipop that calms children when they are tiresome. Or maybe a Popsicle. All I know is that my grandma gave me that wallet because I didn’t receive anything from my birthday! They even forgot it was my birthday…

                he conductor looked at me impatiently. I think everyone else did look at me. They probably thought I’m pathetic. Miserable. I felt so helpless that I began crying. I wish I knew what to say. I couldn’t defend myself.

                Then the passenger next to me paid my ticket. I was relived, of course! But self pity crawled in my body. I didn’t know how to thank him. Or her. I didn’t have time to figure out the gender of that person. I couldn’t even smile at him. Or her.

                I got home at around 10:30. I went straight to my room, feeling the weight of solitude. I wasn’t feeling hungry. Oh, no. not at all. Who would want to eat the usual dinner (chocolate chip cookies and Pringles plus a soda) when all you want to have is a bowl of soup?

                I locked the door, which I never fail to do since my younger brother always gets inside my room, looking for stuff. Stubborn little rat! Last week, o found him and his girlfriend kissing on my bed! Imagine that?! And to think that he was only 15 years old! When I was his age, all I could think of is how to get noticed by my crush!

                I took of my dress and headed to wards the shower room. I felt like a sponge, absorbing every stink.

                Thank God, I thought, a nice warm bath would probably relax my nerves. Five minutes or so in the bathtub. I put on my bathrobe and rushed outside my room. I was somewhat dizzy I almost tripped as I walked down the stairs.

                With my hair dripping wet, I found my sister talking to someone over the phone.

                The covered the mouthpiece and stared at me for a while. After satisfying herself, she resumed talking to the person on the other line, as if she didn’t see me at all.

                I said,” did you hear the noise? I was in the bathtub dozing off when this loud banging! Awakened me.”

                The covered the mouthpiece again and replied, “I didn’t hear anything. Couldn’t you see I’m talking with someone? Go find another person you could annoy!

                I was dumb founded! Maybe I was just hearing things. Maybe the noise was in my dreams. Or perhaps, my sister is in my dreams.

                Till thinking if it was all in my head, I went to the kitchen. All this scrap suffocates me! I was in the wrong house; in the wrong time…everything’s wrong! Since my Mom died, this world turned upside down.

                I opened the refrigerator and found cans of beer and soda, a huge slice of pizza topped with lots of pineapple chunks, chicken leftovers which looked like they’ve been there for decades, and other stuff only children would enjoy. Who eats all those junk away? Oh. Yeah. My father does. And my brother.

                I closed the door of the refrigerator and realized that I kept the faucet running in my bathroom! Running to get to my room, I passed my sister keeping an eye on me. She probably thinks I’m going crazy!

                After turning off the faucet and deciding to get some real sleep, o looked in my cabinet and searched for a pair of pajamas and lousy shirt. Wish I could sleep naked. No shame. No anxiety.

                The phone rang. It was my brother.

                “Is Dad Home?” he asked.

                “Where are you? I thought you were in your room!”

                “Obviously, I wasn’t and probably, I wouldn’t be for the next 24 hours. Is Dad around?” he said, emphasizing every word, as if talking to an idiot.

                “Since when did it matter to you?”

                “Listen, I need him here. Right now.”

                “oh.. So you’re in trouble? Try calling him on his mobile phone!”

He hang up. This kid has been getting on my nerves for several days now. He’s been acting strangely. Vey strangely. I didn’t know what’s keeping him.

                I combed my hair and faced the huge mirror on the wall. I was getting thinner, which reminded me of anorexic women and TV personalities going gaga over diet pills and liposuction.

                Few minutes ago, I was feeling so tired and sleepy but now, it seemed like I slept all day long.

                The evening was inviting, with the stars just above the roof. It’s no longer raining.

                I went to the terrace. When was the last time I had time to see the changes outside the asylum? Couple of months, I guess.

                The phone rang again but I ignored it this time. I was not expecting any important calls, anyway. When I was younger, I thought the world was full of essence.

But that was more than five years ago, when my Mom was still with us. She used to keep the house tidy so that my Dad could brag our place to his visitors. She was also fond of cooking, making every single day a holiday.

                I could still smell what she loved to cook…no wait!

                Then I heard a loud explosion in the kitchen. A minute after, the house is on fire.

                Embracing my self, I saw the fire licking my bed, the ceiling…

                Memories came flashing…how my Mom drowned, my Dad inches away from her, drunk…

                How my classmates ridicule me for getting the lowest remarks? How they frequently forget my birthdays?

How they make me feel about myself -  a fool. Pathetic miserable fool.

                More screams. Louder and louder, then, complete silence.

                I can see things more clearly now, amidst the smoke and fire.

                I’m free at last!

It has been a very long time

And you’re still on my mind

I’ve tried my best to forget you

But my heart doesn’t want to

I know that this is crazy

But how can I make myself free

From our past and memories

That still captures me

Sometimes I wonder if this is real

The feeling that I don’t want you near

Or am I just pretending

Because I’m hurt with what you did

My mind says “move on”

“There’s someone who deserves you more”

But my heart says “Hold on”

You can never find a love like before

Until now, I’M CONFUSED

In what to follow and what to choose

But there’s one thing that I’m sure

I don’t wanna get hurt no more

             Biag ni Lam-Ang story is about a boy who was very extraordinary. He started to talk at a very young age and he is the one who choose his name.

            The characters in the story were ofcourse Lam-Ang the magical one and his love interest the beautiful Ines Kannoyan. His father named Don Juan who goes to the Igorots Tribe to punish those people. And his loving mother named Namongan who belied that his son is powerful and gifted. The rest is sumarang his rival and sarindang the one who tried to seduce him.

            The story was all happened somewhere in Valley of Naguilian River in La Union.

            The adventure began when Lam-Ang started to searched for his father who went in a battle but never came back. When he reached the place he was enraged by what he sees his father’s head was on top of the bamboo.

            Upon returning home, he passed a river named Amburayan River. When he dip his body in the water the fishes died because of his dirt.

            Upon reaching his home he decided to court his love interest Ines Kannoyan the daughter of the richest man in Kalanutian. On his to Kalanutian way he met his rival sumarang they quarreled but Lam-Ang wins the heart of Ines because he amazed all the people by his magical pets.

            After sometime the headman reminded Lam-Ang about their tradition that he had to catch the giant fish called Berkakan.

            Unfortunately, Lam-Ang was swallowed by the shark and died. But with help of his magical pets Lam-Ang resurrect again.

            The story was magical and interesting. Magical in a part where his pets take some actions and something will happen. Story was interesting because there are some parts in the story that was impossible to happen in real life.